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Editors Pick

David Bowie Day Should Be Like This! It Would Be F**king Awesome!

The city of Chicago has declared September 23rd as David Bowie day. Bet theirs has nothing on ours though…

3. Space Oddity

Bowie promises he’ll make it up to you and offers you a ride in a spaceship. Imagining a ride to Mars with the Starman himself, you excitedly agree. Then you find out it’s a Virgin Atlantic ride to the edge of the atmosphere. To make matters worse you’ve been placed in the same ship as Piers Morgan, Katie Hopkins and David Cameron. Fortunately Bowie has brought his gun…

4. Robot Wars
For no apparent reason, Bono has turned up uninvited. Bowie quickly takes umbridge when Bono tells him that he’s come round personally to install U2’s latest album on his computer. Bowie challenges Bono to a round of Robot Wars, with the loser never releasing a record again. Bowiebot starts well and makes substantial damage to Bonobot. It seems that Bowie is going to cream this fight until Bonobot installs Songs Of Innocence onto its rival, the startled and confused Bowiebot freezes on the spot and is about to be counted out when Bowie plays out a song from his new album. Startled by the decent music entering their ears, Bono and his robot both explode. You and Bowie celebrate over a cup of tea while U2’s back catalogue burns in the fireplace.

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